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Dating: Then and Now. The social rules for dating and dating expectations change over time. The social rules for dating change from one generation to the next. There was a time when a proper young man and woman could not speak to each other unless they had been formally introduced. That practice seems silly now. On the other hand, I understand from my patients that it is considered bad manners now for young people to date someone who has previously dated one of their friends. ch a rule did not hold in my time, at least not among the people I knew. I went to an all-men’s college. The only women any of us ever saw were women that were dating our friends. If it were not permissible to date them in our turn, we would have had no one to date. I remember a few girls who went out with as many as three of my friends without anyone thinking that they—or the men they dated—were behaving improperly. Back in those days—before computers, or portable phones, or, even, electric typewriters—the rules were different. (Of course, I go back a long way, to a time when there were streetcars going up and down Broadway. I could buy a milkshake for a dime. All the telephones were black.) It was common, around that time, for men and women to meet at parties or at dances. The kind of dances performed then required holding each other, which put those of us who were shy at a disadvantage. Otherwise, a man and a woman might be “fixed up” on a blind date by a mutual friend. Meetings in bars happened from time to time, but were considered somewhat dangerous—at least by the women. Then, the times changed. Colleges became co-ed, and young people were thrown together informally, making it easier to meet someone to date. Certain social expectations changed also. Instead of couples marrying in their early twenties, they married later. Often men and women graduated college without yet entering into a serious, let alone permanent, relationship. During that particular time—after college—men and women sometimes found it difficult to find each other. The same was true for those who did not go to college in the first place. In another time and place, matchmakers would have been called upon to make the necessary arrangements; but no such social institution existed here in this country. There was need for an organized way for young couples to meet for the first time. The Rise of Advertising. Way, way back in frontier days, men in the wilderness advertised in Eastern newspapers for a bride. Women made the trip West with the expectation that they would marry and be happy—more or less. And it turned out, many did and were, although there is never very much evidence about whether or not a particular married couple is really happy. Similarly, during parts of the latter half of the 20 th century, people once again began to use newspapers and magazines to make known their wishes to meet someone of the opposite sex. These small blurbs appeared in the "personals" section. The advertisements in The Village Voice, for instance, were different than those in the various Jewish newspapers and different, also, from those in New York Magazine. Someone answering ads in one place might be replying to an invitation to engage in some sort of sex—every sort, really. Others were directed at more sober individuals who were thinking of getting married somewhere down the line. Answering advertisements was not yet entirely respectable, but I knew of some doctors and lawyers who married someone they met under these circumstances—including a friend who was a psychiatrist. (The person he met and married was another psychiatrist.) There were two problems inherent in advertising for dating purposes, or answering such advertisements. The lesser problem was the concern that women had that they were endangering themselves meeting strangers about whom they knew very little. monly, parents warned against this practice. Stories circulated about women being lured to their deaths. A movie was made about such an encounter. Consequently, stratagems were developed to make such encounters somewhat safer—that is, refusal by the woman to give her home address, or even her telephone number. Couples met for the first time in very public places. On occasion, a pseudonym was employed. This was before the widespread use of “date rape” drugs; but many women were especially careful, nevertheless, to drink very little. These precautions seemed less important after the first few times a woman responded to these published invitations to meet. It turned out the men they were introduced to this way were no more or less dangerous than men encountered for the first time in a bar, or even men whom they met through the recommendation of a friend. The women reported to me that they did not feel threatened—although they were very likely to report that they felt disappointed, annoyed, or even disgusted, on occasion. (A somewhat older, recently divorced woman told me she was sitting with her date at a fancy restaurant when he took out his teeth and put them in a wine glass.) Being pro-active, as I usually am, I encouraged men and women, too, to try dating this way, although certainly only after taking reasonable precautions. Most of the precautions I thought were important were against being stuck for a whole evening with a boring date. I especially recommended arranging to meet for the first time only for coffee or a drink. Spending a couple of hours with someone who was unattractive and unappealing was not too much of a price to pay for the chance to have met someone who might be attractive and appealing. It was also possible, sometimes, to do something that was entertaining, even with someone who was unattractive and unappealing. I remember, now, an experience I had when I was in medical school. I lived at the Hall of Residence and helped make ends meet by working at the switchboard, (Believe it or not, there was such a thing as a switchboard.) I tried to connect a woman who wanted to reach one of the medical students. The fellow turned out not to be in his room. Somehow, she and I got into a conversation. After a time, she asked if I would accompany her to the theater. I was really impressed. To me, to be forward that way meant either that she was desperate or that she had tremendous self-confidence. I consented. When I met her, I decided she was probably desperate. It would not be gallant of me to describe her; but I had a good time anyway! It was a good play. By the way, the men who advertised, or answered advertisements, had their own concerns. They were afraid they would be rejected out of hand, or made fun of. And they, too, were afraid of being trapped into being with someone who was undesirable. The second problem in responding to these advertisements was that some people thought doing so implied that they were desperate. (See my reaction reported above.) No one wants to seem desperate. Both men and women often find it difficult to approach someone at a party, let alone announce to the world that they are eager to meet someone. In a larger context, this is a problem that impacts all dating situations: how to seem interested without seeming desperate. I remember a young, single, attractive (I thought) woman who was working in a hospital and, to my surprise, going unnoticed. It turned out, I realized after a time, that she had hidden herself by looking away when she walked by someone in a hallway or when she stood next to someone in front of an elevator. She was too shy to try talking to them. But there was an intern whom she thought was nice. She would have liked going out with him, she told me. “You have a good excuse to say hello to him,” I told her. “He examined you when you had a sore throat. When you run into him in the hospital, thank him. Tell him you’re better now, and you want to thank him by buying him a cup of coffee.” What she would have liked him to think—what she should have liked him to think—was that she was a friendly and nice girl, and just possibly interested in him as a man. The trick in these situations is to be friendly and allow the interpretation that you might be interested in the other person. Being friendly and inviting is not the same thing as seeming desperate. It is okay—even desirable—to show that you might be attracted to that other person. Being cool and unattainable is not a good strategy. In her case, she managed to become invisible. 1. Women, in particular, are afraid of meeting strangers because they think those encounters are potentially dangerous. Women who arrange dates with men may worry that they might be lying about who they are, about how educated they are, about how much money they make, even about whether they are actually single. In short, they may not be the men they are advertising themselves to be. Women, similarly, may lie; they may be more likely than men to lie about their age and weight, and anything else they think detracts from their attractiveness. Photographs may be years out of date. Some men and women have been known to put up other people’s photographs and represent them to be their own. 2. Women and men alike are embarrassed by the idea of admitting openly that they would like to find someone to date. They think—at least, some of them think—that trying to meet someone over the internet means they cannot meet anyone any other way. I have had patients who met and married perfectly presentable people and continued to lie about the fact that they met through an internet dating service. They were still embarrassed. They would like to maintain the fiction that love happens spontaneously without their bothering to think about it. They think that is everyone’s expectation. There is a right way to enter into internet dating. It is important to have reasonable expectations, and it is important to accept the fact that you want to meet someone. Just as most other young men and women do. (Next: an argument for internet dating.) After 10 Years, Here's Why I’m Over Online Dating. Ten years is a really long time to be single. It’s also a good amount of time to see the natural evolution of a thing. Since I was born in 1982, online dating is one thing I’ve gotten to observe. I’ve seen online dating evolve from lengthy profile setups that took hours if not professional help to complete, to simply importing Instagram photos with zero information required of you or offered to the swiping party. Even the effort we put in to join online dating has become a pittance, so it’s no wonder the participants have become such passive, jaded swipers with attention spans that last the length of time we spend on the toilet. Yes, I am aware that you have a co-worker whose best friend met her husband on Tinder, like, two days after she broke up with her boyfriend of five years. We’re all very happy for Jessica. But in 10 years (that’s 3,650 days, kids), all that I’ve ever done is swipe through faces, go on bad dates or go on good dates that have led to literally nothing at all. The third option is rare enough to count with the fingers you have available while holding a Starbucks. And now, 10 years into being single, I do not have any interest in playing the game. And I don’t think it’s just me. I think I’m witnessing the decline of online dating to the point of its inevitable demise. The illogical nature of online dating has always perplexed me. It took the far-fetched notion of love at first sight and made it something you were supposed to be able to find with your thumb. The notion of “matching” with someone is the most cursory exploration of compatibility imaginable, and it’s only gotten more superficial over time. There is nothing, and has never been anything, about online dating that actually connected two people. Any time I’ve been in a relationship with someone (we’ve acknowledged that hasn’t happened in a while), it’s happened because attraction and friendship were allowed to develop over time. Online dating is the microwave version of relationships, and I’m the underdone burrito with an icy center that nobody wants. First dates in the online dating world aren’t dates. In the IRL dating world, two people are often acquainted, at least in some loose capacity, before dating, which creates, if not a respect, then a fear of consequences. Online daters have never been burdened by this. Stand her up, never text her, it doesn’t matter. We weren’t introduced by a mutual friend who would think less of me, we don’t work together so I won’t have to see her every day, I could just disappear into the night and once I unmatch with her, she has no way to contact me ever again. Don’t worry, I didn’t give her my last name. Online dates aren’t dates. They’re sitting down at a bar with a complete stranger while taking turns talking. I have never had any success really connecting to someone in the span of two glasses of chardonnay. I like to think both myself and the other party would feel more invested if we were introduced by a friend from camp. One part of online dating’s evolutionary twilight that stings in a particularly painful way is the decline of effort. The amount of effort single people put into online dating has moved from excitement over a shiny new toy to people who can barely be bothered to move their thumb an inch to the right or left. Where once I had an inbox full of messages to respond to, now I just have an endless scroll of unresponded-to attempts at starting a conversation. I’m talking dozens upon dozens of men who just never bother to write back. What was the point in the right swipe, I wonder?

The date tally is even more shameful. I used to go on at least a date a month. I went on three dates last year. The conversations that do begin in an app fizzle out after mere moments. The only way I actually meet a human being in real life is if I put forth 100 percent of the effort. ggest we meet, suggest a date, suggest a place, suggest a time. If I don’t complete these requirements, the conversation won’t last much longer than “How’s your weekend so far?” And I don’t do that often because I want someone to reciprocate my effort. But no one does. Are we exhausted, over it, or is this just not a thing anymore? I always sort of went along with online dating because I didn’t want to be the kind of person who was closed off to possibility. Instead, I should have just been myself. I should have just followed my instincts the first, not the 50th time, a man on Tinder asked me to do something overtly sexual, if not offensive, the very first time he sent me a message. I should have done what I knew was right after flipping through my first 1,000 faces without so much as meeting for coffee. Now, at what I can only imagine is 100,000 faces or more, I’m being very oddly validated. The voice in the back of my head was right all along. I was always going to end up here, with nothing. I wonder what I could have done with all the time I’ve spent looking at faces. Wait, you know what?

I don’t want to know. For 10 years, I didn’t listen to my conscience. I kept participating in online dating because I thought I had to, because it was there. No one would offer anything or anyone so much time, so many chances to come around. But I did, because online dating built an answer to a constant question ― only that answer was a lie. The question was: Where are single men?

Where do single men go?

Where do single women find single men to speak to? Honestly, it’s the most difficult question I’ve ever been faced with, and I’ve taken two bar exams. So when online dating offered up a bottomless bucket of single men to interact with, I jumped at it, and I kept jumping, and jumping, no matter how high in the air the apps held the brass ring. Online dating is full of single men, and full of single women. And absolutely nothing else. There’s no connection, no premise, no real incentive to hold attention and engagement. There’s only so many times you can offer me something without delivering it before I decide that you were lying from the beginning and I start to realize it’s the end for you. I think it’s 10 years. Call indian dating site. On cutting-edge science, according to browse profiles photos of regulations that encourage serious relationships have lasted for an online dating verification pass. 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Remember, there are thousands of people looking for love (or even friendship) online. On a site like Single and Sober, you already know that you have common ground. So, don’t be afraid to seek genuine connections in 2021. Put Yourself Out There. In order to get a big payoff, you have to take risks. That applies to online dating, too. The more people you message, the more likely you are to meet someone who you connect with. So, rather than talking yourself out of messaging people who you see online, try to talk yourself into messaging them. If someone is very attractive, or a great writer that’s ok — they still want to hear from you. If a profile catches your eye but hasn’t been active lately, send them a message anyway. You never know when your profile might grab someone’s attention. Cast a wide net, and see what you catch!

See The Silver Lining. 2020 was rough on many relationships. Unfortunately, the pandemic led to many breakups. Maybe you were one of them. Seeing relationships end is always sad, but it also has a silver lining: it means that more and more people are looking to date. If you feel like you’ve seen all the profiles on your dating apps, maybe give the site another look. You just might find someone new to dating who is a good match for you. Embrace Slow Dating. Many people are still being cautious about who they meet in person. Because of that, you’ll likely spend more time talking online and by phone before going on an actual in-person date. Rather than getting frustrated with that, try to see the time as a chance to create meaningful connections with others. You have the chance to ask questions about them and connect emotionally, since connecting physically is off the table for now. Ask Important Questions. As part of slow dating, you have the chance to ask questions that you might shy away from in person. Ask people about their recovery journey, or how the pandemic impacted their recovery. Be sure to share your challenges and victories too. Who are the most important people to you?

What are you most excited for when life returns to normal? What is your favorite food?

Is there a dish that reminds you of home? What is something you’re proud of? What is one of your favorite memories? Expand Your Horizons. Online dating makes it easy to filter out qualities that are deal breakers. Maybe you pass over profiles of people who are shorter than you, or people of a certain age. While these things might seem like dealbreakers, a lot of couples will tell you that they fell in love despite their differences. This year, why not take a chance on expanding your dating pool?

There’s no harm in talking to more people, and you might just find someone you’re really interested in. If you really form a strong connection with someone, their height or age will probably seem insignificant. Rather than shutting down new connections, challenge yourself to say yes for a week or a month. Reply to anyone who messages you, and reach out to anyone who catches your eye. Even if you don’t find someone who you’re interested in romantically, you’ll have some good conversations and improve your communication skills along the way. Make Sure Your Profile Is Up To Date. Last year brought a lot of changes for many people. You might have lost your job, moved (temporarily or for good) or changed your appearance. Maybe the pandemic made you change your priorities or pick up a new hobby. As you start dating in 2021, make sure that your profile (and pictures!) are the most accurate and up-to-date representation of who you are. Don’t be afraid to lean into the changes that you’ve made, and embrace the new you!

Try New Types Of Dates. Once you’ve chatted a bit with a person you’re interested in, give a new type of date a try. In 2021, you can have all sorts of experiences in the comfort of your home. There’s the classic Zoom date, where you connect via video chat. But you can also tour museums, listen to concerts, watch independent films or play games together, even if you’re apart. These dates are a low-risk way to have fun and forge a deeper connection, while staying safe. It’s easy to get overwhelmed with online dating. Rather than viewing dating as a mission to find your future partner, change your mindset to one focused on fun. You can meet new people, try different activities and have interesting conversations without putting pressure on yourself. In 2021, adding playfulness and experimentation to your online dating game can help you get excited about meeting new people. Kelly Burch is a freelance journalist who regularly writes about addiction, recovery and mental health issues. Her work has appeared in The Washington Post, Vice, and more. Kelly isn’t in recovery herself, but comes from a family that has been touched by addiction in many ways. When she isn’t writing, Kelly enjoys kayaking or getting lost in the woods of rural New Hampshire, where she lives. Connect with Kelly via her website, Facebook or Twitter. Get your ID. Get more dates. Give your love interest confidence you’re legit. I f you’re an online dating user you know that there are major safety and security issues on dating apps, including catfishing, romance scams, and even violent crime. It’s no surprise that singles everywhere are asking their dates to get verified and get an ID. Women especially feel a need to stay safe from the dangers of dating online. I founded DateID in 2016 because I wanted a quick-and-easy way to prove to women I was safe and could be trusted, to get more hookups, meetups and serious dates alike. It didn’t take long for the idea of having an ID for dating sites to catch on. Before I knew it I was getting interview requests. We were featured in DatingAdvice.com, Global Dating Insights, Mobile ID World, Planet Biometrics, Biometric Update, and Internet Security Buzz. View our press page to learn more. DateID quickly became the leading ID verification site for online dating, worldwide. Fast forward to 2021 and we’ve issued hundreds of thousands of IDs, globally, that have helped men and women connect safely online. How to get your ID. The most trusted ID for hookups, meetups, and serious dates One ID that works globally on all dating sites and apps Award-winning technology that enables you to get your ID instantly The ability to easily prove you’re safe and can be trusted A secret weapon that stops scammers in their tracks. Easy to get started. It’s free to sign up. Verifying your photos, location, and social media accounts is also currently 100% free (with no credit card required). We might start charging for it in the future, so take advantage now. So long, deception. DateID has hundreds of millions of records, and thousands of singles use our background check platform to verify each other every day. Because online dating users are fed up with being deceived. They finally have a way to verify that their matches are safe and can be trusted. No ID, no date!

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Mark, whom Matthew and Luke follow in essentials, gives us a precise dating: "On the first day of Unleavened Bread, when they sacrificed the Passover lamb, his disciples said to him, 'Where will you have us go and prepare for you to eat the Passover?'. And when it was evening he came with the Twelve" (14:12, 17). The evening of the first day of Unleavened Bread, on which the Paschal lambs are slaughtered in the Temple, is the vigil of the Passover feast. According to the chronology of the Synoptics, this was a Thursday. After sunset, the Passover began, and then the Passover meal was taken – by Jesus and his disciples, as indeed by all the pilgrims who had come to Jerusalem. On the night leading into Friday, then – still according to the Synoptic chronology – Jesus was arrested and brought before the court; on Friday morning he was condemned to death by Pilate, and subsequently, "around the third hour" (ca. 9:00 a.m.), he was led to the Cross. Jesus died at the ninth hour (ca. 3:00 p.m.). "And when evening had come, since it was the day of Preparation, that is, the day before the sabbath, Joseph of Arimathea. took courage and went to Pilate, and asked for the body of Jesus" (Mk 15:4243). The burial had to take place before sunset, because then the Sabbath would begin. The Sabbath is the day when Jesus rested in the tomb. The Resurrection took place on the morning of the "first day of the week", on Sunday. This chronology suffers from the problem that Jesus' trial and crucifixion would have taken place on the day of the Passover feast, which that year fell on a Friday. True, many scholars have tried to show that the trial and crucifixion were compatible with the prescriptions of the Passover. But despite all academic arguments, it seems questionable whether the trial before Pilate and the crucifixion would have been permissible and possible on such an important Jewish feast day. Moreover, there is a comment reported by Mark that militates against this hypothesis. He tells us that two days before the Feast of Unleavened Bread, the chief priests and scribes were looking for an opportunity to bring Jesus under their control by stealth and kill him, but in this regard, they declared: "not during the feast, lest there be a tumult of the people" (14:12). According to the Synoptic chronology, the execution of Jesus would indeed have taken place on the very day of the feast. Let us now turn to John's chronology. John goes to great lengths to indicate that the Last Supper was not a Passover meal. On the contrary: the Jewish authorities who led Jesus before Pilate's court avoided entering the praetorium, "so that they might not be defiled, but might eat the Passover" (18:28). The Passover, therefore, began only in the evening, and at the time of the trial the Passover meal had not yet taken place; the trial and crucifixion took place on the day before the Passover, on the "day of preparation", not on the feast day itself. The Passover feast in the year in question accordingly ran from Friday evening until Saturday evening, not from Thursday evening until Friday evening. Otherwise the sequence of events remains the same: Thursday evening – Jesus' Last Supper with the disciples, but not a Passover meal; Friday, the vigil of the feast, not the feast itself – trial and execution; Saturday – rest in the tomb; Sunday – Resurrection. According to this chronology, Jesus dies at the moment when the Passover lambs are being slaughtered in the Temple. Jesus dies as the real lamb, merely prefigured by those slain in the Temple. This theologically significant connection, that Jesus' death coincides with the slaughter of the Passover lambs, has led many scholars to dismiss John's presentation as a theological chronology. John, they claim, altered the chronology in order to create this theological connection, which admittedly is not made explicit in the Gospel. Today, though, it is becoming increasingly clear that John's chronology is more probable historically than the Synoptic chronology. For as mentioned earlier: trial and execution on the feast seem scarcely conceivable. On the other hand, Jesus' Last Supper seems so closely tied to the Passover tradition that to deny its Passover character is problematic. According to this chronology, Jesus dies at the moment when the Passover lambs are being slaughtered in the Temple. Jesus dies as the real lamb, merely prefigured by those slain in the Temple. Frequent attempts have been made, therefore, to reconcile the two chronologies with one another. A most important and indeed fascinating attempt to harmonize the two traditions was made by the French scholar Annie Jaubert, who developed her theory in a series of publications starting in 1953. We need not go into the details of this proposal here; let us confine ourselves to the essentials. Jaubert bases herself primarily on two early texts, which seem to suggest a solution to the problem. First she refers to an ancient priestly calendar handed down in the Book of Jubilees, which was a Hebrew text produced in the second half of the second century before Christ. This calendar leaves the cycles of the moon out of consideration and bases itself upon a year of 364 days, divided into four seasons, each consisting of three months, two of them thirty days long and one thirty-one days long. Each quarter year, then, has ninety-one days, which is exactly thirteen weeks, and each year has exactly fifty-two weeks. Accordingly, the liturgical feasts fall on the same weekday every year. For the Passover, this means that the fifteenth day of Nisan is always a Wednesday and the Passover meal is held after sunset on Tuesday evening. According to Jaubert, Jesus celebrated the Passover following this calendar, that is, on Tuesday evening, and was arrested during the night leading into Wednesday. Jaubert sees here the solution to two problems: first, Jesus celebrated a real Passover meal, as the Synoptic tradition maintains; yet John is also right, in that the Jewish authorities, following their own calendar, did not celebrate the Passover until after Jesus' trial, and Jesus was therefore executed on the vigil of the real Passover, not on the feast itself. Both the Synoptic and the Johannine traditions thus appear to be correct on the basis of the discrepancy between two different calendars. The second advantage emphasized by Annie Jaubert shows at the same time the weakness of this attempted solution. She points out that the traditional chronologies (Synoptic and Johannine) have to compress a whole series of events into a few hours: the hearing before the Sanhedrin, Jesus being sent over to Pilate, Pilate's wife's dream, Jesus being handed over to Herod, his return to Pilate, the scourging, the condemnation to death, the way of the Cross, and the crucifixion. To accomplish all this in the space of a few hours seems scarcely possible, according to Jaubert. Her solution, though, provides a time frame from the night leading into Wednesday to the morning of Good Friday. She also argues that Mark gives a precise sequence of events for "Palm Sunday", Monday, and Tuesday, but then leaps directly to the Passover meal. According to the traditional dating, then, two days remain of which nothing is recounted. Finally, Jaubert reminds us that, if her theory is correct, the Jewish authorities could have succeeded in their plan to kill Jesus in good time before the feast. Pilate then delayed the crucifixion until Friday, so the theory goes, through his hesitations. One argument against this redating of the Last Supper to Tuesday, of course, is the long tradition assigning it to Thursday, which we find clearly established as early as the second century. Jaubert responds by pointing to the second text on which her theory is based: the so-called Didascalia Apostolorum, a text from the early third century that places the Last Supper on Tuesday. She tries to show that this book preserved an old tradition, traces of which are also found in other texts. In reply it must be said that the traces of tradition to which she refers are too weak to be convincing. The other difficulty is that Jesus is unlikely to have used a calendar associated principally with Qumran. Jesus went to the Temple for the great feasts. Even if he prophesied its demise and confirmed this with a dramatic symbolic action, he still followed the Jewish festal calendar, as is evident from John's Gospel in particular. True, one can agree with Jaubert that the Jubilees calendar was not strictly limited to Qumran and the Essenes. Yet this is not sufficient to justify applying it to Jesus' Passover. Thus it is understandable that Annie Jaubert's theory – so fascinating on first sight – is rejected by the majority of exegetes. I have presented it in some detail because it offers an insight into the complexity of the Jewish world at the time of Jesus, a world that we can reconstruct only to a limited degree, despite all the knowledge of sources now available to us. So while I would not reject this theory outright, it cannot simply be accepted at face value, in view of the various problems that remain unresolved. So what are we to say? The most meticulous evaluation I have come across of all the solutions proposed so far is found in the book A Marginal Jew: Rethinking the Historical Jesus, by John P. Meier, who at the end of his first volume presents a comprehensive study of the chronology of Jesus' life. He concludes that one has to choose between the Synoptic and Johannine chronologies, and he argues, on the basis of the whole range of source material, that the weight of evidence favors John. John is right when he says that at the time of Jesus' trial before Pilate, the Jewish authorities had not yet eaten the Passover and, thus, had to keep themselves ritually pure. He is right that the crucifixion took place, not on the feast, but on the day before the feast. This means that Jesus died at the hour when the Passover lambs were being slaughtered in the Temple. That Christians later saw this as no coincidence, that they recognized Jesus as the true Lamb, that in this way they came to see the true meaning of the ritual of the lambs – all this seems to follow naturally. The question remains: Why did the Synoptics speak of a Passover meal?

What is the basis for this strand of tradition?

Not even Meier can give a truly convincing answer to this question. He makes an attempt – like many other exegetes – through redaction criticism and literary criticism. He argues that Mark 14:1a and 14:1216 – the only passages in which Mark mentions the Passover – were later additions. In the actual account of the Last Supper itself, he claims, there is no reference to the Passover. This argument, however many major figures have come out in support of it, is artificial. Yet Meier is right to point out that in the description of the meal itself, the Synoptics recount as little of the Passover ritual as John. Thus with certain reservations, one can agree with his conclusion: "The entire Johannine tradition, from early to late, agrees perfectly with the primitive Synoptic tradition on the non-Passover character of the meal" (A Marginal Jew I, p. 398). We have to ask, though, what Jesus' Last Supper actually was. And how did it acquire its undoubtedly early attribution of Passover character?

The answer given by Meier is astonishingly simple and in many respects convincing: Jesus knew that he was about to die. He knew that he would not be able to eat the Passover again. Fully aware of this, he invited his disciples to a Last Supper of a very special kind, one that followed no specific Jewish ritual but, rather, constituted his farewell; during the meal he gave them something new: he gave them himself as the true Lamb and thereby instituted his Passover. In all the Synoptic Gospels, the prophecy of Jesus' death and Resurrection form part of this meal. Luke presents it in an especially solemn and mysterious form: "I have earnestly desired to eat this Passover with you before I suffer; for I tell you I shall not eat it until it is fulfilled in the kingdom of God" (22:1516). The saying is ambiguous. It can mean that Jesus is eating the usual Passover meal with his disciples for the last time. But it can also mean that he is eating it no longer but, rather, is on his way to the new Passover. One thing emerges clearly from the entire tradition: essentially, this farewell meal was not the old Passover, but the new one, which Jesus accomplished in this context. Even though the meal that Jesus shared with the Twelve was not a Passover meal according to the ritual prescriptions of Judaism, nevertheless, in retrospect, the inner connection of the whole event with Jesus' death and Resurrection stood out clearly. It was Jesus' Passover. And in this sense he both did and did not celebrate the Passover: the old rituals could not be carried out – when their time came, Jesus had already died. But he had given himself, and thus he had truly celebrated the Passover with them. The old was not abolished; it was simply brought to its full meaning. The earliest evidence for this unified view of the new and the old, providing a new explanation of the Passover character of Jesus' meal in terms of his death and Resurrection, is found in Saint Paul's First Letter to the Corinthians: "Cleanse out the old leaven that you may be new dough, as you really are unleavened. For Christ, our Paschal Lamb, has been sacrificed" (5:7; cf. Meier, A Marginal Jew I, pp. 42930). As in Mark 14:1, so here the first day of Unleavened Bread and the Passover follow in rapid succession, but the older ritual understanding is transformed into a Christological and existential interpretation. Unleavened bread must now refer to Christians themselves, who are freed from sin by the addition of yeast. But the sacrificial lamb is Christ. Here Paul is in complete harmony with John's presentation of events. For him the death and Resurrection of Christ have become the Passover that endures. On this basis one can understand how it was that very early on, Jesus' Last Supper – which includes not only a prophecy, but a real anticipation of the Cross and Resurrection in the eucharistic gifts – was regarded as a Passover: as his Passover. And so it was. Pope Benedict XVI. "The Dating of the Last Supper." excerpt from Jesus of Nazareth: Holy Week From the Entrance Into Jerusalem to the Resurrection (San Francisco: Ignatius Press, 2011).

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